Devon &Epic Win.

I knew it. I knew it, knew it, knew it.

Yeah, well, don’t come near me

I’ve got friends in lower places

Struggling upwards

Taking in the view

Tearing up my eyes

With you in them

Don’t fuck with me

I knew it, I did.

Almost out of school! About goddamn time. So, over the summer? Let’s get this tee thing I’ve been talking about for two years up and running, yeah? Liv and I can get some more songs written, go to some shows. Get some podcasts out there, start doing our thing again. This has to be the summer we get a lot of stuff off the ground, I have this odd feeling that if we don’t now, we won’t ever start.

I’m listening to The Format, which is basically Fun. (because Nate Ruess is singing) but less… I don’t know. Thought out, I s’pose. I love them regardless. It’s probably because I love Nate’s voice so much. (^_^)

But this summer, I’m thinking there will need to be parties. There will need to be events. Because while I loved last summer, I also would like to meet new people, and get to know ones I’ve met already. For saying I don’t like people, I really do like getting to know people. I’m actually a pretty social person, I just get angry easily. Anyway. That was a random little.. yeah. Haha.

Oh! And! I’m making mix CDs of random stuff from my iTunes tonight. Some people may be interested in getting in on the new music shtuff? Hit me up if you want a mix. It probably won’t be anything super special, but you may find a new song/band you like. :]

whatever happened to you, darling, when I waited for you to feel right? and now it feels all wrong, I tried too many times to forget you, tried too many times to remember the dreams and not you. oh, no, not you. I don’t wanna remember your name, I wanna get on with it! I wanna a new time, my darling I’ll get the hell out of here. I’ll get out of here, I’ll get out and I hope you’ll wish you were me. I know you’ll wish you were me. so kill me, clean it up and clear it out. I know you’ve already done that. but when I come home, you’ll wish you hadn’t. when I come home, you’re not going anywhere.

This feels horrifically familiar.

We get caught in every tie we ever double-knotted, never taking the courage to step over them sometimes.

If we were as strong as our minds built us up to be, then how could we not handle such a weak attempt at something new.? A new level of life, far from any other we’ve encountered. A new experience waiting to be lived if only just for the privilege of writing it down for something all your own.

Ah, it’s been a while, my loves.

I suppose my mind cannot keep me away too long. But I’ve addressed an issue with the system; a slight apathy I cannot condemn to death and barely can contain. I tried once before to stick with my own time, my own mind, but got carried away- only once before -with the idea of Another’s. I have not indulged in such a venture since, but I find the time coming in which my weakness might be measured by how many friends I cut from my wires. Such a failure will not be tolerated, but I wonder if it’s worth cutting myself off from it entirely.

Perhaps we’ll actually get something written. (Yeah right, like that’s going to happen. we both can’t concentrate on our own stuff for 5 minutes.)

IN OTHER NEWS;

I’ve been taking lots of pictures lately (check some out on my deviantArt) &playing tons of The Sims 3. I really like the new game, it’s really neat. I miss a lot of the Sims 2 features, though, like the alien abductions and death-by-satellite thing, but over all it seems to be a huge improvement freedom-wise. I have a feeling that I will be able to play this one for a much longer time than Sims 2, and still not figure out everything about the game. Which is a good thing, because I know the creators will take FOREVER trying to top this one with #4. ;]

I’m posting this to remind Olivia (and myself) about our Deathfic.

We’re pretty much lazy,

so it’ll probably take a while, just like all our projects, but eventually it WILL get done!

—

Sidenote; I got my new phone. :]

I’m happy!

Stabbed through the heart with hedge shears and gutted with a trowel.

He buried her under the flowerbed.

“I think I’ll plant begonias this year.”

He sat on his porch, drinking lemonade and watching the neighbor’s dogs bark at him from over the fence.

The sun’s just going to swallow us up someday, what’s the point in waiting.? Just dive head first into the inevitable blandness and sleepwalking trances you were born to walk. Dancing.? Oh, no, true dancing is for those who’ve learned to accept. And you are far, far away from that. Hate is such a bitter fucking excuse, a cyanide pill of envy and greed and fear. Take it for the stupid ones. They never knew what living was anyway. Who really knew.? All the words you let slip from your tongue are soft and sharp, not burning like acid, but lulling and smooth until their turn to bite down hard. How’s this for a lullaby.? Sleep tight, the world will end but nobody’s here to ask you how you feel. I pick fights with everyone because I no longer have anything to gain from being your friend. How can I express myself and be myself when all you people do is strangle my life to the point of bland stereotypical mush.? So no, it’s not at all what you think it is, it will never be. Jump off a cliff and nobody will care. But jump off the empire state building and everybody will pretend they’re horrified. Then go back to their cushy lives and family, only appreciating them until the commercial break is over. Don’t tell me I’m jaded, it’s how they are. It’s how you are. It’s how I am. And as far as I’ve fallen into apathy, it’s almost impossible to reclaim my actual feelings. The few who care won’t care long enough. The few who care long enough are dead. And the planet’s being eaten, swallowed by the sun and the moon and the endless vacuum of space that is nothing, nothing at all. And I could care less.

Bored.

Bored with apathy, though it’s left now.

Funny.

Thought it would never leave.

No fun to be numb.

Not much fun to feel, either, but you get lots more from life that way.

–

Can’t get the first few lines of Tiny Vessels out of my head.

Constantly have Dashboard Confessional in my head, too.

…

Huh.